See, everyone talks about these “quarter-life” crisis’ and all that jazz. I’ve always been a pretty “together” person. Sure, I have my dramatic side and when I’m around the family I can throw a pretty good freak-out but in general, over the years, I’ve become quite calm.
People tend to think I’m older then I am and the majority of my friends are 3 to 9 years older then me. So I’ve never really given this crisis a lot of thought. Most of my friends have been through it long ago.
Two Friday’s ago, I was let go at my job. Most of it had to do with the Dragon-Lady who was condescending and belittling to me. She is the Pres’ assistant and the only one who’d deal with being called at all hours of the day and night so they couldn’t exactly fire her.
She also got one of the other ladies in on it and according to New Girl, those two are bestest buds now.
I was given a decent severance and my Boss sent around an email that made it sound like I’d quit. I was shocked, he was upset, and apparently everyone wondered “What the hell happened?!” In a small company though, not much you can do.
After this happened I immediately went to the library and got out half a dozen Working Girl books: How To Succeed in the Workplace, You’re Hired, How to Get A Life, Don’t Be A Dumbass, etc.
So I’m getting myself together – I went grocery shopping and bought $350 worth of food, household stuff and Gladware; I did the dishes and vacuumed; I even went for a couple walks over the week.
Tuesday I get a call that a friend of mine from High School has died in a car accident while he was in Australia. Of course, at the funeral there were a lot of people I haven’t seen in a while. Even the people I was closest to in High School I only see a few times a year.
It’s really hard when you don’t see people (even for a few months – the last time I saw this group of friends was in May) and then you see them at something like a funeral.
What can you really say about a funeral? The service was nice, the reception was good and if he was here he would have loved it.
Needless to say, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking this past week. Thinking about what sort of job I’d really like to do, thinking about moving – maybe Vancouver, maybe the East, thinking about friends, thinking about what is important in life.
I broke down Sunday morning and cried to Blondie. I couldn’t remember the last time I had cried (other then the funeral). I didn’t cry when Pseudo and I ended things, or I found out he had a new gf, I didn’t cry when my house flooded and I had to go live with my parents for four months, I didn’t even cry when I got fired.
That’s how I know I need a change and a big one. I think they call this the quarter life crisis. I’m not sure what I’ll do yet, and for now the staffing agency is on the lookout to find me another position but I told them it may not be too permanent.
I guess I’ll just have to wait and see.
*Who am I kidding