May or May Not Have

I think we used up all our funny this weekend. I have never laughed so hard in my life (other then an incident that involved poker, cake, Michael Bolton and dog food but that’s a story for another day). I’m not sure if it was the hot (32-38 degree Celsius) weather, the steady stream of alcoholic beverages or just the fact that I was with people I love to be around but holy hell was it a fun trip.

Although there are a few fuzzy details (why was the joke about roofies so hilarious? Who first started comparing Larry to Chuck Norris? Why did we decide that swimming through the lake in pitch black night was far safer then traipsing through the woods to return to the boat?) I guess some things we’ll just never know.

In light of the weekend, and since I seem to always have a list once a week here is:

I May or May Not Have:

Left the Following on O/N’s Boat (he was there for a stag):

  • 1 leg warmer
  • 2 pink & black gauntlet gloves
  • 1 black skirt
  • 1 rabbit tail
  • 4 beaded shot glasses
  • 1 gold flip-flop
  • 1 sailor hat
  • 2 bikini ties
  • My singledom (more on that another day)

Used the Following Sentences:

  • Damage deposit…? Well, what happens if we lose the boat? ( I was dead serious)
  • I only call you bitches ‘cuz I don’t know y’all individually
  • Listen you douche-monkeys
  • Nobody can die on my watch. Promise? It’s almost Co-Captains turn so lets jump off the edge then.
  • Who knew a mag light was water proof!? What? It’s not? Shit.
  • Larry doesn’t throw up when he drinks too much…He throws down!
  • Well your damage deposit may be gone…but so are we…ha!
  • It’s wabbit-hunting season (while dressed like a playboy bunny)
  • Two men…one toothbrush

Done the Following:

  • A keg stand, after which I promptly projectile vomited beer, then did another.
  • Hit my head on a ceiling fan and loudly announced that I was “concussed”
  • Woken up, poured & drank a Gin caesar, then gone back to bed on the top deck
  • Thought I was going to die on the way home when our driver, going 200 in the pouring rain decided it would be funny to start poking her bf. Around the mountains. While passing another car.

So August-long anyone…?

Advertisements

7 responses

  1. OK I love the sentences you used! I would have turned those into a form of top 10 list from the weekend!Getting concussed is rough…

  2. “I only call you bitches ‘cuz I don’t know y’all individually” – I am PRAYING you used that sentence seriously cos it is awesome!!!

  3. Paula – that was my most overused sentence this weekend…seriously

  4. Douche monkeys is my new favorite word combo! Now if I can just find someone to use it on…..

  5. douche monkeys?! haha might have to start using that one…and that last sentence sounds scary…thank god u didnt die!

  6. YES! Puke and rally! That’s my favorite 🙂

  7. Next time, please pack me! I’m small and can fit easily in an overnight bag!

:: tell me something good ::

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: